And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize