so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
