I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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