he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
