You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Sorry about my life...
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
