she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
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