She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
