Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
