the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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