if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Randomize
