THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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