So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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