i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
