Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
