Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It's official drugs can't kill me
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
