I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
