puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
The Olympian is in my bed
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
