We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
