now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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