the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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