it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
