i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
