My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
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