I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
