Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
