____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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