Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
