end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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