I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
