We named our party play list daddy issues
she smelled like a LAN party
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
