Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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