Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
