Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
