Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
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