I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
