Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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