I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
