what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
