i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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