new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
My breasts were aching with rage.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
