he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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