I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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