brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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