Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize