Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
