so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
