Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
