What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
