TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
