As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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